Taking Responsibility, Making Progress

If you have been following my blogging journey over the last several weeks, you probably noticed that I did not blog yesterday. I took a day-trip to the Berkshires to meet up with friends, which was delightful and much-needed! However, when I got home, the last thing I wanted to do – quite frankly – was write a blog. Even though it was still pretty early (just after 9:30 pm), and there was plenty of time left to post even a paragraph or two, I just didn’t want to.

It’s late. I’m tired. I’ve been traveling all day. I reasoned with myself.

I’ve been really good about this blogging journey. One night off won’t kill me. I thought.

Well, although it’s true that it didn’t kill me – and it was late, and I was tired, and I did travel all day – the point of this journey has been to keep up the habit of blogging each day, no matter how long or how short the entry. And when I realized that this morning, I immediately began the habit of beating myself up! (Have I mentioned before that my inner critic is incredibly strong and loud?)

You KNEW you shouldn’t have taken a day off. You want to inspire others along their journeys, right? What kind of example are you setting if you don’t keep the habit up?

Once I caught myself in the act of beating myself up, I stopped. I let myself off the hook, and decided I would get back to blogging today. Easy-peasy. Simple enough, right?

Not exactly. 😉

As I was running a few errands this afternoon, I started to think about what to blog about today.

I really don’t feel like writing today. I’m still pretty tired from yesterday. What’s one more day off? It’s just a weekend . . . I can always pick the blogging back up tomorrow.

As the afternoon went on, I kept justifying all the reasons NOT to blog. And that’s when I realized – get on the computer and blog NOW. I may have “fallen off the wagon” yesterday, but it doesn’t mean I have to continue that behavior today. I took responsibility for taking a day off yesterday, let myself off the hook (for the most part), and hopped on the computer to write. As someone who has spent a lifetime of trying to develop new, healthy, self-supporting habits (and often giving up after a day or two of “failure”), I realized that this is a new behavior in and of itself. This is being responsible to myself, and it is progress. And for that . . . I am celebrating. 🙂